Oh me....

So much to say so little thought organization!
For one I am still enjoying vacation time with my family. Sean and I just got back from a great retreat, just the two of us. We have't been just the two of us for more than 24 hours in over 4 years! It was bliss!!! Initially I don't think we knew how to handle ourselves...think Braveheart "FREEDOM!!!!"
Still very nice to get home and love on my babies. I missed them like crazy and was filled with love and joy just to cuddle them.
Also new this week was purchasing Caiden's uniform and gathering more info from SACS. I am excited for him to attend Christian school but at the same time I still have in the back of my mind the homeschooling concept. Ugh... I am not a homeschooler. I have what feels like little control over my household but still the thought of am I making a good decision flares up. I love that SACS has sports and school pride, God pride. I don't know how I could cultivate that some kind of school pride team work here in the home. I realize private school has its own host of issues but Sean and I always have said either homeschool or private. I've always "X'd" the homeschool option. But somehow the anti-homeschooler I that I am, I am secretly trying to see how I could possibly make that work. Just thoughts people...just thoughts....
And to top that one off, I'm trying to figure out just why I am working. I love my job! Being a nurse and helping new and scared moms, helping sometimes sick babies, working with the people that I do. I love it! But really if I didn't work my home would save money and allow Sean to bring in more than what his and my pay combined bring in. Why am I doing this??? I love it! Pride? Could pride be tied to this? Thats the story of my life, go figure! As it is I only work 2 days. 2 long days but still I get to escape the confines of these four walls. Initially when I started work I definitely felt like God led me there. I was licensed to practice nursing and why wouldn't I use that license? Right now I see it as I have experience and my kiddos little lives keep going. They are growing fast and I want to make sure I never miss a thing! Whether thats in their private school functions or if I am their teacher I don't want to be absent from the time they wake up to the time the sleep even if it is 2 days. But then I could justify and say its only 2 day its not that bad :) Truly these have been my thoughts for over a couple of months but I hate the thought of leaving my hospital and well buying Caiden's uniforms and checking his event calendar may have overwhemed me. Oh Lord help me! And this is why this blog is titled journey through my thoughts because it sure is a journey!
Ahhh its out! I think I feel better. Oh yes, and prayers are much appreciated.
Excuse any grammatical errors or typos. I'm new at this ;)